The Excellent Adventures of Kim and Kev

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

The Airport - Part Three! Are We There Yet?

So, I'm stuck in the Atlanta airport. One of my least favorite places to be.... my other least favorites being a men's public bathroom, a snake pit, and jail. I cannot even begin to tell you how "over this trip" I was at this point. I was sweaty, smelly, and starving. And I was not about to keep it to myself.

I began texting every body that I could. And dramatically told them of my current situation. There are some (lots of) situations that I absolutely cannot stand to NOT be in control of. My bowels, Kev's meals, family skit night.... and traveling. I am so serious when I say that I would rather drive cross country ( to Tennessee... is there really anything else beyond that?) than fly. Flying is such a waste of time.

Enough whining... it was time to take control of the situation. I sponge ( paper towel) bathed in the bathroom sink, readjusted my bra for comfort ( which means I took it off) and went on a quest for food.

Finding healthy food in an airport is quite exhausting. If you remember.. I am/was competing in The Biggest Loser competition... and just because you are in a horrific situation - it does not mean that you can eat whatever you want. Unless you are so freaking starved by the time that you get to Tampa that you go in to a Carrabas at 9:45 at night and order pizza, bread, and sangria. But I don't know who would do that... because I sure wouldn't.

Anyhoo... I finally found the perfect healthy meal. Organic nut mix. Ummmmm... I don't think that was the real name of it. But who really cares. I wonder if you can guess what was in it besides delicious dried cranberries and blueberries. Anyone? Anyone?

That's right... NUTS!

One of my favorite foods of all times. They always say...." If it don't have cheese and/or nuts on it, then it ain't worth Kim eatin'." I don't know who "they" is and why "they" are so "country".... but "they" do have a good point.. about my eatin' habits.

I got my snack mix, my water, eleventy billion more magazines and searched high and low for a remote and quiet spot.

And not five minutes later a family decided to sit down RIGHT BESIDE ME when there was plenty of empty seats all around me. And not only were they a family but they were a family with a screaming baby! I texted Kev so much that he changed his phone number, email address, and moved to some state on the other side of Tennessee.

It was bad folks... and I seriously do not know how I survived.

But I did. And I boarded the plane to Tampa without too much of a delay......

That is actually the plane I was on. I set the camera on a timer due to my insecurities of taking pictures by myself in public.

I arrived in Tampa safe and sound. And then preceded to wait for 1 hr for the other people to get there so we could share a van. This was not by choice but by force. After the hour was up... and some people were "no-shows"/lost/purposely adding to the agony of my day... I was granted permission to get a cab. I was so sweaty, starving, smelly... and exhausted at this point that the cab driver doubled his fee. Just to spite me. And to cover the expense of cleaning the smell out of the back of his cab.

Luckily, my hotel was DE-vine. A brand new Embassy Suites. And it sure was "suite". (sorry - I had to do it)

Once in the comfort and seclusion of my very own bedroom.... I began taking pictures of things that I had experienced throughout the day....

Such as this delightful bag/purse whose straps decided to start letting go of the bag halfway through the trip. It is always so much fun to carry your large totebag filled with heavy binders... under your arm. It makes people stare at you and call you "weirdo". Out loud.

Then there is this tasty treat. Oh.... and I was right... it is NOT called "organic nut mix". It is called "simplicity medley". This stuff was seriously out of this world and the best "nut mix" that I have ever had!
Ok... so that was one good thing about my day... and here is the second good thing.... FIJI water! I used to drink a HUGE bottle of this every day. Which is crazy and ridiculous... especially considering how much a bottle costs. But when the company is paying for your food.... it is all about buying the good stuff. I mean they did force me to FLY and SIT IN THE ATLANTA AIRPORT FOR MOST OF THE DAY. I think I deserved it.

And then the third good thing about my day was who was waiting for me in the hotel room... on the bed.....

My parents! Ok... so they weren't really there. But I was so delirious that I thought that they were and I asked them to sing to me.
Sing to me? I think I am delirious right now... so I better wrap this up. I do, however, want to let you in on a Switzer family secret... We LOVE to take pictures of us posing on hotel beds. We all do it. And no one ever questions it... well family never questions it. You probably will be questioning it so much that you won't be able to sleep tonight.
I may or may not post my equally ( if not more) agonizing trip back to Columbia. It has truly traumatized me to re-hash this story. It also depends on if anything else exciting happens in my life this week.
Ok... so that probably means that you will be hearing about my return home.
Up Next... "My Favorite Things". Because I do care about you enough to give you a break from airport stories.

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